Staying home

Recently I met up with an old friend from art school.  We hadn't seen each other for more than eight years.  We hadn't even talked.

The structure of those conversations is as follows:  You show me yours, I'll show you mine.  If I like what I see, we can be friends. Shake.

This particular conversation that happened in Oakland on a Tuesday afternoon made me realize just how much I've done since I left New York, let alone just the time I was at art school after high school.  It left me wondering why I had decided to do all the crazy stuff I did, because frankly, most people don't.

It's unclear to me if most people just don't want to deal with the potential risks involved, or if they concentrate so hard on their daily routine they forget what they do now impacts what they do later.  It really isn't that scary.  Okay, well it is rather scary, but in an adrenaline junkie sort of way, not in a you might die any second way.

Everyone says to live your life, but they don't really mean that.  Most people say it and expect that means doing a couple of fun or interesting things and then settling down into a boring company job where you shuffle papers all day (if you're lucky).  If you're not lucky, then you get to work three or four jobs every day and you're still collecting government money and never do anything interesting.  That unlucky situation is what most people mean to avoid when they say live your life.  There are only two alternatives for most people.  Both are their own special incarnations of hell.

How about this: how about instead of doing anything the way someone else dictates to you, you figure out what you want from life and then go get it, regardless of the path it takes you down? Now, I'm not arguing for anything illegal or untoward.  Don't misunderstand me. I just mean, open your mind to the possibilities of adventure and excitement.  When the opportunity to study abroad next semester comes up in the last two weeks of the current semester, don't wait.  Just do it.  When someone puts the proposal for a masters degree in your lap that seems right up your alley, don't sit around wondering if you can get in.  Meet with the professor driving the program and convince him you're a good idea before they're accepting applications.  When someone comes into your life who fits your entire package of personality traits in a life partner, woo them.

There is no reason to wait.  There is no reason to stay at home doing nothing to further your greatest adventure - living.  People will say, no, I can't do that.  If it came out of your mouth, you're right.  You can't.  People saying I might be able to, well, you're right.  You might.  And those extraordinary people who nod their heads and say, I am doing it, will do it, and have done it.  They are right too.  I have been the latter for 8 years.  It is the best, most rewarding, exciting thing I could have done.  It's not easy.  But if I wanted an easy life I would have stayed at home.