The dust has settled leaving three thousand miles between Christian in New Jersey and me in Santa Barbara. Yesterday, my mother-in-law drove us down to LAX to depart California for 2.5 months. The drive back was riddled with shopping excursions, brunch, and a visit to Christian's grandma's place. It was fun and kept my mind off what had just happened. Not like it was real or anything. After all, he had only been gone a couple of hours.
But even today I find myself feeling differently than I expected. I don't mean to say that I don't miss him, but rather, I'm not worried about losing him.
The last time we were apart we were still dating. When you're dating there is always the feeling like the person you're with might cheat on you, leave you, or just let the relationship peter out. Marriage CAN be like that, but only if you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing. A healthy marriage doesn't have those problems - plus you're legally bound together. You can't just walk away. There are quite a few hoops to jump through as opposed to when you're dating. Dating doesn't require any formal process. You could break it off at any time.
So while we're apart, I just don't feel the impending doom I used to feel when we were apart before. Granted, it hasn't been very long yet. It also doesn't hurt that Christian and I are best friends and can't help but talk to each other daily which maintains our relationship over the distance.
It gets me thinking about how spoiled we are. Not only do we have this awesome marriage, but we live in a time and place where communication is instantaneous. I can email, call, text, or chat with Christian the second I feel so inclined. We can talk several times a day if we like. I can't imagine living when my grandmother was young and having to suffer the speed of hand written letters. The idea is frightening to me now - waiting to hear from Christian for a week?! What if something should have happened to him? I wouldn't know it for so long! Yes, there were telegraphs and phones weren't unheard of, but a letter was much more likely. Less than a hundred years later, personal communication devices make it possible to watch and hear a person thousands of miles away. Weird... and... thank GOD! Think I'm going to go chat with Christian now.