Make-over? From Cathy with Love

I'm going to be honest, I am not a sales type of girl. I don't usually like interacting with people at stores except on my own terms. In fact, I really don't. I find it frightening. This isn't because the people are actually scary, they really aren't. Mostly it's just because I hate it when people try to force me to do something I don't want to do. It stimulates my fight or flight response.

Let me give you an example. When I was a freshman in college, one of my friends got it in her head that she should tweeze my brows. Now, I have pretty nicely shaped brows, but my dad is Celtic and my mother's part French. They did need a little shaping. However, I was convinced this was going to be painful and I had no intention of anyone causing me pain. So she, and another of my friends (I use this word loosely here... though I do still like these two women), tried to grab me and hold me down. I'm glad my crazy strength kicked in at that moment because otherwise it could have been really bad - picture tweezers in the eye. :-/

Needless to say, after I dragged two young women down the entire length of the dorm hallway (they were latched onto my ankles), they decided maybe it wasn't worth it to try to pick off a few stray hairs.

You can imagine how I might react to people in stores if I would react to my friends this way.

Still, every now and then, I give in. Today was one of those times. There is a sweet lady from my church who sells Mary Kay. Now, I had never tried Mary Kay cosmetics, nor had I any idea what kind of quality they were etc. I was flying blind. The woman invited me to come to her house for a little session where we could try out some products and do my face. I have to admit, I was a little nervous about it. I was concerned I was going to get pushed or something, but I was pleasantly surprised.

After my facial/make-over

I have to hand it to that company. They know what they're doing. Your beauty consultant becomes your friend. Honestly, the only other time I had felt this kind of concern from anyone was in a lingerie boutique and possibly Sephora (though at Sephora, it should be noted, the associates don't become your friends while they might at a high-end lingerie shop). I left with super soft skin, some awesome looking make-up, and a few free samples (plus Cathy gifted me with some eye cream!).

Unfortunately, a lot of the skin products were a little out of my price range (when I say a little, I mean, quite a lot at this point). But the make-up itself is about the same as if you were buying something from the drug store, except it's way better quality. So, would I buy some of these things if I had the cash? Yes, absolutely. They're still cheaper than the same quality you would get of a designer brand like Chanel etc. Plus, you get to go to little parties at people's homes and you get to try out different colors than maybe you would normally use on a typical day. That's not the mention the fact that you get someone who keeps track of everything that you buy and use and teaches you how to use these things. She becomes your friend. And she's your Mary Kay hook-up. Sweet.

Feminist Fashionista - Dynamo Coco Chanel

Chanel in the 20s

Most of the time we think of fashionistas as shallow, frivolous, and perhaps even ditzy. The "best" stereotype of the fashionista involves arrogance, snobbery, and condescension.  Thing is, fashion is more than just the mindless flippancy of the Legally Blondes of the world.  It is a statement and dictates more than just culture.  It is a means to liberation or bondage.

This past week on March 8, International Women's Day came and went.  I was thinking about it all week.  How women have come such a long way during the 20th century and now we're facing some serious steps back with things like quiverfull women, redefinition of rape victims, and the systematic war against reproductive rights.  It makes me wonder what is going on in people's minds that they could even suggest these ideas, let alone discuss rewriting law or completely reshaping their lives to accommodate perversions of sacred texts.

But let's get back to something small that impacts women daily and frequently goes unnoticed - fashion.  Clothing says something about a person.  Now a woman can wear anything she likes.  Her options are open.  If she wants to dress in clothing fit to play contact sports she can.  If she wants to wear clothing that reference days when clothing was an extension of female repression, she can. More than any one woman, Coco Chanel paved the way for the woman's ability to choose how she would live.

At first changing how she herself dressed was something she did for her own comfort. She did this even though it blatantly flouted the convention of her day. When she began her fashion house, she really transformed the nature of clothing for women.  No longer were women forced into debilitating and painful clothing.  They could breathe.  Their internal organs could stay in the place nature intended.  She referenced working class patterns, fabrics, and designs rendering them elegant and eye-catching. Things that had been looked down upon were given artistry and beauty.  Even the simplest things could become elegant statements of feminine expression.

Though fashion now is considered something of a luxury relegated to celebrity and wealth, the roots of modern fashion facilitated the increased freedom of women and allowed for subsequent cultural transformation.  It's worth watching the movie Coco Before Chanel (I recommend the special features as well). Take a minute to raise a glass of Champagne to one of the most important women of the 20th century - here's to you Coco!

Try Something New - Break a Mold, Have an Adventure

As complex as our society has become, I am convinced that people who break out of molds are still considered completely strange, possibly fantastic (in the traditional sense of the word, coming from the root fantasy).  Despite all the different things we are able to do and be, humans have the tendency to put each other into boxes, and allow themselves to stay within them.  So when a person decides they won't be categorized, people can become shocked and frustrated, or they can have a whole new world open to them.

I am thinking particularly of the relatively simple juxtaposition of someone who likes art and football, or fashion and reading the Times.  These things are oppositional by all accounts to our society, but of course, there are people who like to do each set of things, and some who like all four (I'm thinking of myself...strange bird that I am). The more I interact with people, the more rare it is for me to find someone who enjoys multiple types of things, or who is at least willing to entertain something outside their own cultural sphere.

What does it matter? Why push one's self to read a reliable news source while at other times contemplating the far reaching impact of teal on Jimmy Choo?  Well, the less easy it is for someone to put you in a box, the more fun it is for everyone.  Necessarily you run into more kinds of people than you are likely to if you only race RC cars than if you also watch ballet.  You increase your likelihood of adventures, which is always enjoyable for you, and tends to lend some excitement to your varied group of friends.

In this world, it is easy to have varied interests.  Now you can access almost anything from almost anywhere (as long as you can pay for shipping to more remote locations in the worst case). However, it is just as easy to keep yourself in a rut.  You could do the same thing day in and day out, and your life would never get more exciting.  It would never change.  You would continue to read the same books, eat the same cereal, and wear the same bland dress clothes.  It would be predictable.  So isn't it better to change things up? Isn't it better to try something new and experiment with different interests when there is really nothing stopping you from taking a dance class or learning mountaineering?

It's better to try it rather than not.  What can you lose? At the very worst you have a story of adventure.  At the best, you open a new door to all kinds of wonderful things.  It sounds like a win to me.

The Miracle Worker - A Right-Sized Bra

Lingerie.  Yes.  It's the thing we all think about but don't really talk about. We don't talk about it because it is associated with sex and we live in one of the most sexually repressed cultures in the world. Personally, I blame the Puritans.

The thing is, lingerie in general may have associations with sex but it is far more than just about sex.  Women buy lingerie for many reasons and it does just as many things.  I'm going to forgo discussing sports bras and compression underwear or special camping underwear that you can in theory wear throughout an entire treacherous backpacking adventure without washing. In fact, I'm going to ignore panties altogether. For the purposes of our discussion, let's keep to the most fundamental piece of a woman's wardrobe - the bra.

Thankfully in recent years, women have become better educated about fitting a bra, and therefore more women are wearing the right size. Still, there is a pandemic of poorly fitted bras out there.  It is awful considering the blessed alternative. Let me tell you right now, once a woman wears the right sized bra, she will never EVER go back. Supported breasts don't just mean sag-prevention.  You hunch less.  Your back will thank you.  Your confidence gets a little boost.  Depending on the bra, you may feel sexier.  And best of all, it makes you look younger and thinner.  Yes, a good fitting bra is a multi-tasking miracle worker like none other.

It took me a long time to learn about the wonders of the perfectly fit bra.  I was lucky a friend of mine worked in Nordstrom's lingerie department and treated me to a day of fittings and experimenting with different brands.  I now know every brand that makes my size (which I can say is unusual and therefore I have limited choices of what I can buy and where I can get it). Most women in their twenties aren't lucky enough to have someone who knows what they're talking about when it comes to bras.  A lot of women I know (who shall remain nameless) only figured out what they needed several decades later, and some still haven't (or are so stuck in the A-D cup paradigm they don't understand the wide world of possibilities and perfect fitting potential).

Chances are you think you know your bra size, but you really don't.  Breasts change (some women's change over the course of every month) and so they need to be sized regularly in order to guarantee correct support. Very few women actually are an A, B, C, or D cup.  The fact that so many manufacturers cater to our ignorance, rather than trying to educate women on their bodies is wrong.  So, as a woman, do yourself the best favor ever.  Go to a nice lingerie store - a boutique place or even Nordstrom.  Don't bother going to Macy's, Sak's, or Frederick's. You won't find knowledgeable salespeople or your size.  Yes, the experience will cost you, so be prepared.  I would suggest you consider it an investment in your body like good moisturizer, a personal trainer, or organic farmer's market produce.  It is totally worth it.  Once you know your size, how to fit a bra etc, you can go down the street to Nordi's Rack and get the same bra for 20$ instead of 80$.  Your girls will love you for it, and so will your bank account.  It's absolutely worth the trouble for a daily miracle.