Showing posts with label fantasy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fantasy. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Starting from Scratch in Fantasy Cosplay

WonderCon 2011
I have a dream - a dream of fantastic costumes and hairstyles. Of Khloe Alwell made real.

When Kiddo was little, and unaware of everything beyond 12 inches from his face, I watched the SyFy channel religiously (I mean, those are my people). My favorite shows were the reality special effects shows, like Face Off, but I also found Heroes of Cosplay fascinating. I love how people transform into fantastic characters before my eyes. It scratches that part of my creative brain. But I've never done it myself.

I do not consider myself a hardcore fantasy/sci-fi nerd, by any stretch. I hardly count as a fan. Periodically I dabble. I mean, I've watched some anime. I've read Pern books. I grew up with Star Trek, Aliens, Labyrinth, and The Princess Bride, but I never really dove into the fan culture. I never owned comic books. I never played Magic or LARPed, or anything of the sort.

I comfortably straddled the fence between genre nerdom and popular culture.

So even though I also knew a lot about art, I didn't learn much about fabrication. I had no real impetus to learn. I didn't involve myself in drama, or in cosplay. I can barely work a sewing machine (mostly because I haven't practiced...at all).

And then I went to a comic convention. It scratched that part of my creative brain. I read about characters that I might cosplay, that Christian and I could cosplay together (we decided Thor and Sif were probably the most look-alike comic characters).

But... now that Khloe is finished as a series (read: shedding single tear), I really want people to fall in love with her the way I have (and everyone in the Otherworld does in the books). So Christian and I were talking about it, and an idea was born.

If I was a character in a graphic novel...
Christian: Alexis, why don't you cosplay as Khloe? I mean, are there any outfits that would work?
*I blush*
Christian: Did you just blush?
Me: Some of the outfits are...
Christian: Really?
Me: I mean, they're tasteful, but they are definitely...uh...
Christian: Hm.
Me: I mean, I would love to cosplay as Khloe. I love the clothes. I just don't know how I would make them look like they are in my head.
Christian: Do you know anyone who cosplays? Who might help you?

Ahem. So, that's where we are. Do I know anyone who cosplays? Who could help me fabricate this? Or who would want to fabricate it? These are involved outfits, some of which would be pretty intense projects, but also might put a person on the map (judging from the things people look for in the Heroes of Cosplay show).

Leave a comment below or message me: http://facebook.com/authoralexisdonkin or twitter @alexisdonkin

I'm so serious about this, so if this is a project you'd be interested in, please let me know!


Friday, May 22, 2015

Why I Love Khloe Alwell, and You Should Too

During my launch of THRIVE, I started the process of revamping - or rather rewriting - my Khloe Alwell series.

I fell in love all over again.

I had forgotten how rich and complex the books are. I forgot the nitty gritty of all the characters. I forgot how damn sexy the boys are. Like...really. I forgot how much I totally love Laran.

In talking with a friend about my love of Laran, she grinned.
"Have you ever heard Anne Rice talk about Lestat?" she asked, twisting her lips.
"No," I said, raising my brows.
"You talk about Laran the way she talks about Lestat. Like, you really love him." Her eyes sparkled and I grinned sheepishly.
"Laran is my dream man. If they ever did a TV or movie adaptation of these books, I might have problems. My marriage might be in trouble. I mean, I think I might fall in love with Laran. I might forget the poor guy was just an actor."

And it's true. But the other guys are nothing to sniff at. I mean, I love them all for different reasons. All my characters are family to me. But Laran is... something else.

And because I love him, love all of them, I had to publish a second edition. I didn't do the best job I could have when I first published these books, so I went back. Hopefully I'm doing my characters justice. I want readers to fall in love with Khloe. To hate her attackers, get angry with her, to bite their lips as she yearns, and to cringe as she tries to reject with grace. I want them to ache when Laran enters a scene. To grumble with Constantine. To saunter with Freyr. I want them to glow with Dani.

I want readers to get bloody and bothered and caught up.

This is why I am so pleased that second editions of THE BROTHERS and LOVERS AND RIVALS are now for sale on Smashwords (and soon after on all major online retailers).

If you haven't explored Khloe yet, I invite you dive in, see humanity as you've never seen it. Explore climate change in a way that you never imagined. See myth, faith, love, sex, and high school in a wild story of self-discovery and empowerment that shows what girls are made of - the stuff of legend.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

The Waiting Game

Watching time go by...
Lately all I do is wait. I'm just waiting. My own version of purgatory.

"A 34? Proceed to window 7. A 34? Proceed to window 7."

That is what I may as well hear. Because I'm waiting.

I'm waiting for responses to my doctoral applications. I'm waiting for those responses because I cannot make any choices without that information. Honestly, I haven't determined the choices I would make in hypothetical scenarios. So I snap at those closest to me. I curl in a ball on the couch. I hold on to the present as best as I can, as best as I ca wait.

I'm waiting for feedback on my nonfiction book. Waiting to respond to all those social media posts that clearly don't have experience in the things I do. That don't seem to understand what they are saying to people who share my secret life. Waiting to reveal myself, my history, for all its horrors and glory. Waiting to make a splash even as the waters are dark, filled with sharks and blood. Biting my nails. Donning my armor. Watching. Sharpening my sword. Waiting.

I'm waiting for someone to read book 4 in Khloe. Waiting to be ready to reread it. To rewrite it. To draw the cover that it is meant to have. To be inspired into that art. Waiting to publish it, for those fans loyal to the series. Waiting to push it against all those science deniers...waiting to connect it to the stories of the extreme things that should only be the stuff of fantasy, but are real. The drought...the storms...the insane snow...are real...and where do they come from? Waiting.

I'm waiting to get that mentor promised me. Waiting to hear back from websites. Waiting to get help recording videos - recording audio - creating platforms. Waiting to have enough time to work out. Waiting to decide what I want to do with my life. Waiting to pay off my debt. Waiting to change the world. Waiting to have people understand my deepest depths. Waiting to get a job. Waiting to be independent. Waiting to have the benefits I so desperately need - the rewards I so richly desire. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting.

I am not a patient person. I have done all that I can do to prepare. I have done all I can do to hold on to this vision in my head of a future, of a more wonderful life. I just can't wait any more. I can't stand another day. I can't stand another hour - another minute - another second. It is crushing my spirit - my mind - my heart.

I just want to hear...

"Alexis? Proceed to window 1. Alexis? Proceed to window 1."

Friday, August 15, 2014

Writing Process: Change is Good

No, I haven't forgotten this blog. I just got sidetracked by things like a new book (when am I not?) and studying for the GRE (ironically my weakness is verbal!).

In a rare moment of peace, it's clear I need to update you, dear gentle readers.

My mind is a whirlwind. I am, as some artists say, In the zone. In fact it is difficult to do anything except work on this crazy idea of mine. Once again I let myself be pulled into a completely different project (surprised?).

I approached it differently than I normally would. Rather than wait for revelation, I developed the main characters in their entirety. Then I determined the scope and scale of the story. The intention, for many reasons, was a three part series. I even have the titles for each book and a rough sketch of the outlines for each. It is, quite a departure from my writing process in the past.

Why this departure?

I need to avoid blocks. I don't have time for blocks. I tried a few different things to address this problem and so far this seems to work the best. I've been writing this project for about a week and have already reached 17000 words in the limited time allotted every day. In short, this has been the most successful process I have tried.

It probably helps that the idea is something that's been stewing for almost 3 years. It came to me during a bout of insomnia. I've written and rewritten several iterations of the story in my head and it never felt right. Then I finally decided to try this different process and it connected.

I am so pleased with this process I may even try to go back and revise book 4 of Khloe with this in mind. I really want to finish that book and currently it feels forced to me (pun intended) as opposed to natural. It just feels like I'm cramming too much too fast. So I will finish this project (or at least part 1) and then I will revise book 4 and complete it.

After that? Maybe the Rollins pack? It seems series are where I need to focus. My foray into nonfiction was not as successful as I would have liked. I'm not giving up on that venture, but I'm also not committed to it the way I am to my novels. Fiction is my first love and I need to honor that.

It is my fate.

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Two Projects Are Better Than One

I say two projects, but really I'm talking about three or four.

I'm a busy girl, so sue me!

As you may have seen, I published my first non-fiction book last week (52 Lists) and I have another two non-fiction pieces that I'm hoping to have edited etc by the end of April.

I've been talking a lot about my dream inspired book, but what you don't know is that I stopped working on it temporarily. I got stuck. I couldn't come up with the right scenarios and backdrops for the subsequent chapters, so I couldn't continue writing the book at this point. I'm just not sure where to take it and I haven't had a chance to brainstorm with Christian (who has been a great help in structuring that book).

If I want to continue with my 2014 master writer plan, I can't afford to get stuck. I have to keep moving forward. So what did I do? I moved on to the next fiction book in my list.

Fans will be pleased.

I've been writing the conclusion of the Khloe Alwell series. i'm about half-way done (or atleast a third anyway). It's going really well, so I may end up writing this straight through (I hope).

If I only had one thing to work on without any ideas (or unfinished manuscripts) waiting in the wings, I would have been in a horrible situation in relation to my writing goals this year. The moral of the story? As many people will tell you not to work on more than one project, don't listen. Sometimes it's helpful to keep a few things in the wings. I don't recommend constantly jumping from project to project, but having something that you can jump to when you hit writer's block is definitely a good way to keep up momentum.

As it is, I'm generally writing twice as many words working on Khloe than I did working on the other fiction piece even though I have about the same amount of time to write (Which may be increasing now that my baby can play by himself for periods of time! Yessss!).

Writer's block? Nah. Second project for the win!

Monday, March 31, 2014

The Imaginative Subconscious Mind

Where will this dream lead?
My current project is loosely based on the worlds created by my delightfully overactive subconscious mind (I'm actually using this post to help generate some specific details for the next installment of the novel...crossing my fingers!).

I have, for as long as I can remember, the most emotionally intense, vividly detailed, saga length dreams. Whenever I describe my dreams to other people they look at me like I'm crazy.

You know Game of Thrones?
You know the Xanth books?
How about the Valdemar books?
What about Malazan?

Yeah. Like that.

That's how I dream. Every night that I remember my dreams, it's like I've read through an entire fantasy series. Sometimes I get "best of" repeats of themes or locations. Very rarely do people repeat. Very rarely do specific situations repeat.

I dream about wars. Battles are fought between good and evil in my dreams. Philosophies are squabbled over. Demons come to claim the souls of champions who must fight them back into the pits of hell.

Loves are star-crossed. Some are unrequited. Resolution comes with a bittersweet price.

Sometimes I lucid dream. I usually think about what I'm dreaming of as I'm dreaming, but occasionally I'll actively change something. If a character from my dream thinks I need to know something, they'll respond directly to me about a thought I'm having - this always freaks me out because I'm almost never talking to them.

When I make an effort to lucid dream and I'm worried there will be a battle or a monster or something, I carry a claymore across my back (I am Scottish!). It's nearly the size of me, but I'm dreaming so I can carry it and wield it easily.  Then I kill whatever I don't like with my giant sword. When something dies, it turns to a sort of gray vapor and dissipates. I get the best of both worlds this way - no mess or gross, and satisfying destruction of whatever is bothering me.

Sometimes I dream about the future, and it comes true. This is a little unnerving and unfortunately I've never been able to really keep track of things or dream of something useful (i.e. I can't do the whole, "beware, this is a bad idea! steer clear!" or tell someone who they're going to marry, so don't bother asking.). Usually it's just a moment in time, like eating dinner at a diner or sitting in church, or knowing a conversation before it happens (Once I even dreamed an episode of Castle before it was shown - so useless.).

Typically I dream of a cluster of moments surrounding a major crossroads or life event (such as when my husband lost his job or when my son was born - both happening in the span of 2 months). And these dreams usually occur anywhere from six months to a year beforehand from what I've observed. The moments show up disguised in my crazy epic dreams, a way of thinking about things - like seeing a chessboard with people instead of pieces. Then I see them play out in real life...that's as best as I can explain it.

Yeah. My dream life is...intense.

This is how I'm able to create such crazy worlds and complex relationships in my novels. I imagine all kinds of possibilities in my subconscious mind. The more I learn, the more I incorporate.

I play out all kinds of concepts, ideas, and choices. My dreamscape is a place where I can determine where my heart really lies or come to a decision (I married my husband because of a dream. No joke. Call me crazy.).

Dream are a curious thing. Some symbols are universal, others cultural, while still others are personal. They are a point of fascination for many people, and have been a point of study for psychologists (even spawning areas like depth psychology). Needless to say, dreamscapes are a fantasy/sci-fi writer's candy factory. In the case of my current project, they (combined with my strange fascination for the paranormal) have directed many aspects of my writing.

It will be interesting to see exactly how this novel manifests itself - and even more so, what you think of it. ;-)

Thursday, January 2, 2014

Darkness, Literary Submissions, and SFWA

I am sooo excited about 2014.

This is because, like I said I would, I've revamped my approach to many things. But what has me so pumped? The suddenly discovered new dream of joining the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America.

Considering I have yet to publish any short stories in a professional market, I have a little ways to go towards this dream, but I'm confident. Admittedly, it may take me a little while and a series of other unqualified market publications before I have enough to qualify for membership (It's quite a grueling process if you aren't traditionally published already, which, ha! Is a grueling process in itself!). Still, I know I will succeed in this endeavor.

This membership is more of a tertiary goal than a primary or even secondary one. My primary goal is to gain more exposure for my work. I plan on doing that by publishing short stories related to or at least in the genres of my novels. I came around to this plan (and the series of subsequent goals) in a weird way.

I had a dark moment.

A really, profoundly, and utterly disturbing moment.

Talking about this to Christian, my husband, as we walked around our neighborhood one night got me thinking about I how I could deal with this darkness.

And then it hit me - I should write a story! I've dealt with other things through writing, why not this? I wrote the thing in one sitting - maybe an hour tops. And I was amazed. I was amazed because I wrote something completely unexpected in a genre I never write: horror.

How weird is that? This genre that I almost never read, hardly ever watch, and certainly never write, ended up being the motivation to get back into the saddle and send out some submissions.

I don't know why these things happen the way they do, and I don't know why my search for magazines to submit to yielded such completely different markets than I'd previously found. All I know is, this is definitely a new year.

Thursday, December 5, 2013

40 Things I'll do When I'm a Billionaire...

Or rich and famous or whatever... everyone has a list of things they'd do or be. I'm feeling wistful so I decided to share some of the things I'd do if I was stupidly rich.

  1. Buy a boat - specifically a kayak. I frickin LOVE kayaks. Maybe two. I could go paddling with friends. That would be awesome.
  2. Pay off my debts - I don't know why this is second, but I guess I just like fun a little more. Still, this is something I'd like to get done.
  3. Buy some land, maybe a few plots in different locations. I REALLY want to build/design at least one house. I think it would be a marvellous adventure, and you can't beat the personalization.
  4. Establish a school and after school program. I show my academic stripes here, but honestly I've fantasized about this since I was in elementary school. I'd like to have something special, for kids who have something to them, whatever that might be (regardless of their economic status).
  5. Invest some money, you know, with the kind of plan that would make the Johnson family look like amateurs (Think 10 generations of wealth as opposed to 5! Beat that with your soap empire!).
  6. And what would I do with that investment money? Take care of my parents for one.
  7. And probably my in-laws as well.
  8. And of course set something up for my son - a trust of some sort that could only become accessible after he had genuinely tried to make his way in the world. Not a drop would be his until he'd done something with himself (the same with any other children should we have them).
  9. I'll hire a publicist who was more than worth her salt.
  10. I'll take dance lessons. A lot of them. Salsa. Ballroom. West African. Belly dancing. Hula. Swing. Hip-hop. I absolutely LOVE dancing.
  11. I'd get Lasik (well, I'd like to get Lasik anyway.).
  12. And with my new eyes I'd take up archery. There's nothing like shooting a sharp-ended stick at a target using a piece of tight string!
  13. I'll get regular massages, waxes, manicures, and pedicures. I believe in pampering.
  14. Go to writing conferences.
  15. Travel to all the places I really want to see, namely China, Ireland, Italy, Southern India, the Yucatan (assuming there's nothing violent happening there), Greece, Alaska, Hawaii, France, Germany, Japan, South Korea, Macao, Brazil, Egypt (again with the nothing violent business), and New Zealand (There's more places I'm sure, but I think that's a pretty good start.).
  16. Buy a few pieces of commercial property.
  17. I'll set up a foundation.
  18. Of course I'd start a few businesses.
  19. And I'd have to pursue all those crazy ideas I'm always having. I might even have to start a think tank just to research the viability of such ideas.
  20. I'd have to hire some personal staff, including but not limited to an assistant, accountant/financial advisor, and a lawyer. It's always good to have a few extra sets of hands to deal with the mess money makes.
  21. I will STILL be grateful for the wonderful things I have in my life, like my son, my husband, and my cat.
  22. Oh, and I will try to actually learn a couple languages (more than just the few choice phrases I've acquired throughout my education).
  23. I might buy a vineyard because that sounds fun!
  24. I will host nice gatherings where people who are genuine can mingle with other genuine people.
  25. Buy a space for an art and music studio.
  26. Go to plays.
  27. See awesome music shows.
  28. See dance troupes.
  29. Buy a really comfortable mattress.
  30. I'll have a few more kids.
  31. I might buy a horse.
  32. I'll find a designer who can handle curves to design my wardrobe.
  33. Someone else will cut and style my hair.
  34. Take several cooking classes to get a good handle on Asian dishes and bread/pastry making.
  35. I would start a non-profit consulting company that would help non-profits become more efficient/make the most of their resources.
  36. I might go to the dermatologist.
  37. I'll visit amusement parks.
  38. Volunteer at schools and/or local charities.
  39. Start a magazine or a newspaper/site.
  40. Most importantly, no matter what I did, I would always live life to the fullest.
There are other things I could dream up that hinge on obscene wealth (or even just moderate wealth), but the thing about this list is that it still comes from a particular place. Yes there is stuff on this list, but there are experiences as well. There is giving. I hope that should I come into money at some point, this approach to life won't change. Then again, a stack of money probably isn't enough to undo years and years of socialization in compassion and adventurousness. At least I hope not!

What would you do with a bagillion dollars? Leave a comment below!

Monday, December 2, 2013

Videos for Writers

Christian and I did something a little crazy. We bought a video camera. And what do we hope to accomplish with our new HD super ballistic special fantastic camera? Well, record things of course!

Specifically, Christian is planning on doing some motorcycle related recording, but I'm get to do a few things that are very different, and very exciting.

The first thing is I get to record the baby (and will probably put properly edited videos on my Raising an Alien blog). Seeing as I was never recorded as a child, this is a kind of exciting thing to be able to do for my kid.

The second thing is I'll get to record a few trailer type deals for my books. I'm hoping to have interview questions or something for each series/novel etc. The videos may be short segments - like one question per video - or they may end up being longer bits. I'm not sure. It's going to depend on many things, including my make-up stash (I mean, let's be realistic - I'm over 30 and female. I can't go out without putting a little bit of face on!) to be perfectly honest.

Regardless of how the videos turn out or what form they take, I'm excited about this new way for readers to interact with me (even though it may take some time for anything to get posted). Be patient, cross your fingers, and keep your eyes peeled!

If you have suggestions or preferences for the kinds of videos I put up please comment below or mention me on Twitter or comment on my Facebook page. I'd love some outside input!

Saturday, November 9, 2013

Who Caused Haiyan?

This post is written from Khloe's perspective about a current event that is a little too close to the premise of her saga. It's ironic I thought of this type of terror years before Sandy and Haiyan...

I was watching the news. I read it on my smartphone while waiting for Dani. I knew they had plans to destroy humans but I never thought it would get this bad. I saw Sandy and while my father caught those immediately responsible, it doesn't prevent things like Haiyan from occurring. We have to catch the ones pulling the strings if we want to avoid record wind speeds and death tolls.

Laran has ideas. Like him, I think those responsible are the same ones who killed his parents - the same ones who attacked me, and recruited Macha. And it's only going to get worse. If, as I suspect, there are Seelie and Sidhe colluding against reunification, there's only one solution.

You have to stop. You have to stop thinking everything can be thrown away. You have to stop using things that will only destroy land, water, and air. Stop now! Forget plastic. Forget industrial agriculture. Forget gasoline and constant electronic use. Forget GMOs. Forget fracking and mountaintop removal mining. Forget oil. Forget pesticides. Forget using anything that takes longer than five minutes of travel. Forget cities and computers. Forget clear-cutting and dams.

This time, this obscene industrialization and super technological age, is over. This is your last chance. If you continue, you risk your race's complete annihilation. I'm going to do what I can, but there are no guarantees. You have to do your part. If you don't take responsibility for your actions, for the destruction you've wrought, there's nothing I can do.

In the end,  it's your choice. You decide.

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Author Q & A: Lilith and Ammon

This will be included in my media kit. However, as I was writing it, I thought you might be interested in reading my answers to these questions. Enjoy!

Where did you get the idea for this book?
LILITH AND AMMON is both a prequel and the third book of the KHLOE ALWELL SERIES. As such, it is a combination of a myth from THE BROTHERS and the legend surrounding the main conflict of the Otherworld. When I first wrote THE BROTHERS, I didn't realize how important Lilith's story would be to Khloe, the main character of the series. However as I wrote the second book, LOVERS AND RIVALS, I realized the reader needed to know Lilith's story, and understand exactly why the Otherworld was split into two factions – Seelie and Sidhe. Could you understand the series without it? Probably, but you'd miss some really interesting and important insights into the characters in Khloe's time.
What traits and other tidbits do you share with your main character?
I definitely see myself in Khloe, the main character of the series, but I actually see myself less in Lilith. Lilith is a person who refuses to see what is right in front of her because it makes her feel so uncomfortable. She is scared of change, and that isn't me at all! Lilith does however make impetuous decisions – something I'm known for doing. Then when she does finally come to accept her relationship with Ammon, she works really hard to bring people together and resolve conflict, a theme throughout the Khloe series and something very close to my heart.
Did any of your inspiration for this book originate in your real life experiences?
My inspiration for this book came more from my love of mythology and creation stories. Myths hold truths for people, even in metaphor. I enjoyed tying a number of myths into Lilith and Ammon's story, including some irreverent Biblical references. As to the complicated social structure in this book, it is less like my life and more like daytime television!
What made you decide to self-publish?
I don't like the idea of having to subject myself to the capricious rules of the publishing industry. Though it would be nice to have someone else do the marketing and editing etc, the price to do so seems high. Also, I like the immediacy of self-publishing. Yes, producing a book takes time, however it takes less time when I only have to rely on myself rather than a series of corporate approvals.
Are there any specific authors whose writing styles or subject matter inspired your book?
Again, this book draws heavily from mythology. I would say the most influential books for this series as a whole are THE SEVENWATERS SERIES and THE MORTAL INSTRUMENTS. Marillier and Clare have interesting voices that I find enjoyable for different reasons. I often find myself somewhere between them.
Do you have another project in the works? If so, what is it?
The real question is, when don't I have another project! This series has one more book to complete Khloe's saga (which I hope to publish in 2014). Meanwhile I'm working on another young adult series, THE ROLLINS PACK, which focuses on some other themes near and dear to my heart (gender and family). That series uses my favorite of the paranormal creatures – werewolves. I also have a couple of adult stand-alone novels that are partially finished which I'd like to complete in 2014 (think: mutants and angels, but not together!). On top of that, I have several non-fiction projects I'm developing, based on my professional experiences as well as growing up in a very religious family. It's a lot, I know, but I can't seem to stop!

Saturday, May 18, 2013

SWC Day 10 & 11: A Second Book Finished

I neglected to update you about LILITH AND AMMON's progress yesterday. Sorry, but I ended up a little busier and a little more tired than expected.

The result however, was this afternoon I was able to finish the first draft! Granted, it is a little shorter than I expected, but I realized when I was originally writing it, I didn't intend it to be as long as the other two books. It is a story, that while complex (and has a predetermined ending), was primarily for explanation purposes.

I am not entirely sure I won't go back and add a few little things here and there to the chapters I added, but I have rewritten the first portion of the book already, so there really isn't much left for me to do. Even the formatting is done. It needs another few sets of eyes to double check some things, but then it's pretty much ready for publication.

I'm smiling. You can't see it, but I'm smiling - broadly.

Now I need to figure out the next writing project I should pick up. I'm wondering if it shouldn't be ANDREW, which I started last fall but never finished. I'm not even sure how much of that book I completed. The other option is my angel/demon book (which I think I have more written than I do of ANDREW) or a third fiction option is a sci-fi/suspense/romance piece I began last fall as well. I think ANDREW and this sci-fi piece have about the same size manuscript stub, so in that case it's a toss up. In both cases, I will need a reading day to bring me up to speed.

Wow, I just feel fantastic about this whole writing frenzy of mine. I had no idea I had so much to work with and so little left to do on so many projects.

I do feel a little silly for putting them off as long as I did. Still, what's done is done. Moving forward is the name of the game. Time to take a serious look at my options. I'll let you know my decision tomorrow. Wish me speedy writing and more awesome book endings!

Thursday, May 16, 2013

SWC: Day 9, Reading Day

Because of my crazy night and morning (see earlier post), I figured today was as good a day as any to focus on reading rather than stressing myself out trying to put finishing touches on the art book (finishing touches is the second half of my writing challenge).

So that said, I went from 30 something pages, to page 84 today of LILITH AND AMMON. The manuscript is 99 pages in its current form. That means I only have 15 pages left to read and then I can get the last few chapters written.

This is good. It's been a long time coming and I am eager to finish it. Then of course I'll have to try to cram Book 4 in somewhere this next year (can I make another 8 book publishing goal for July 2014? Maybe yes? We'll see after consulting with kiddo.).

The process of rereading/editing/proofing is good. However a few things struck me as I run through LILITH. I will admit I don't love the book as much as I used to. This is probably because it is a Khloe book and I feel as though my writing and my stories have gone a different direction. Also LILITH is blatantly adult. The main characters have mature concerns that may be beyond the readers who gravitated towards the high school romance of THE BROTHERS.

But then again, we knew in advance that would be the case; that Book 4 would take us back to the more youthful urban fantasy romance of THE BROTHERS with the plot twists and characters of LOVERS AND RIVALS.

Sigh.

Still, I like my wolf boys (THE ROLLINS PACK) and my adult sci-fi/paranormal romances that have taken up most of my imagination as of late. I'm eager to get back to them.

So much to write! EEK! So little time! Good thing I've only got a few more pages to read tomorrow. :-)

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

The Allure of a Nerd Mate

Someone is scratching his head. Probably a whole lot of someones.

Most people upon meeting me would think, "No. No way. She's not a nerd." And I'm not, at least, not like many of my close friends are.

I never played Magic. I don't do MMOs (probably because I would end up crashing my computer in the middle of a raid or something causing my team to lose abysmally). I never did table top anything (ick - text-based?! Bleh!). I didn't own a console growing up - of any kind (Jill of the Jungle anyone?).

Instead, I went outside (despite my unfortunate lack of hand-eye coordination). I learned and made art. I tried new things. I learned about music. I played popular games outdoors and indoors. I went swimming. I even liked cars - like, a LOT (not enough for me to get posters mind, but enough to enjoy them as toys).

But here's the secret, I DID read. In fact, taking after my beloved mother, I read OBSCENE amounts. One of the great pleasures of summer was the ability to read until my eyes were bloodshot and scratchy with tiredness.

I also devoured information. I loved learning so much my favorite magazines and books from the library were usually historical or scientific in nature.

And here is where the line blurred for me - I absolutely loved science-fiction and fantasy. If there was magic or myth - I was there. I watched all the super hero shows (never got into comics though, sorry - still, I do love The Dark Knight). If there was a space ship and aliens, I was all about it. I watched all the space shows with my dad growing up. It was like our bonding time. So when I was old enough, my dad and I went to watch action movies (superheros included). My dad and I went and saw everything involving science-fiction together (Star Trek anyone?), because my mom really couldn't be bothered (let's face it, it's not for everyone).

The result? Even though by all accounts, I'm not a nerd, I had a heavy dose of nerd culture. So when Big Bang Theory came out, I got ALL the jokes. Seriously. All of them. Because I know those guys. I know Penny. She's my party friend who I talk to about girl stuff...and I help her navigate the world of the nerd.

Where is this going? Well, here's the thing. Nerd culture has become sort of cool. Yes, everyone doesn't love it, but it has gone mainstream in a way nerds have fantasized about for years (Honestly guys, you know you did - somewhere in the back of your brain. Don't lie.). The result? Nerds are now interesting. It's alright to go cosplay at the comic convention, and well, flaunt it (Incidentally, I'm seriously considering going as Sif one year, assuming baby weight is a non-issue. Christian is totally Thor.).

The openness of flying one's nerd flag high and free has created some interesting dynamics in the dating world, which leaves a whole lot of Pennys wondering what the hell is cee-pee-tree-dough and why Dr. Spock should have pointy ears. Poor Penny. She's left needing to research a whole lot about her prospective date's interests, and often finding herself confused because she just can't get into it.

Except she and I both know, it's worth it. Nerds are funny, silly, and don't care what anyone thinks about their interests. Many of them are absolutely brilliant. They challenge us in ways other people can't. And while some of them have the social adeptness of a rabid opossum, they can be as loyal and loving as a Labrador. Let me tell you, I would take my adorkable nerdtastic husband over a jerky high testosterone jock any day (and I do, :-)).

So, if you find yourself looking across the table at someone who's idea of a good time involves playing Settlers of Cattan followed by a Star Wars movie marathon, hear him out. He might be the Leonard to your Penny. And I will help you get through that awkward phase of learning the differences between trek and wars, comics and movies, science and spirituality, video and board. I promise. It can be done. And it has.

Monday, May 13, 2013

SWC: Day 6 - Fiction v. Non-fiction

Oh. My. God. What. Have. I. Done?!?!?!

Non-fiction and fiction are not two sides of the same coin. They are different animals that must be kept in separate cages as far from one another as possible or they will TEAR EACH OTHER APART.

Or maybe that's just my brain. Yes. Must be my brain.

I started with my ART book yesterday and ended at 4536. In order to reach my writing goal today I needed to get to 9,036. Thankfully, and after much pain, moaning, and gazing longingly around the room I finished my daily writing at 9,055. Phew! THANK GOD!

I discovered today, in no uncertain terms, that my process for writing fiction and non-fiction is drastically different. It is easy for me to write fiction. I can sit down where I left off, and just let my mind (and fingers) go for hours. I write fiction faster than I write anything (which is saying something because I tend to blog pretty quickly).

Non-fiction requires me to think, recall, and reframe. I have to come up with a kind of narrative to frame the knowledge I'm trying to impart. It's a hassle. It's stressful. It makes me want to bang my head against the wall, at least when I'm working on something in book length (for some reason articles and blog posts are easy to fire off - don't try to understand. I sure as hell don't). I can't seem to think of the narrative fast enough and so I have to jump around my chapters while I'm thinking of something relevant. The result is my time is not used as efficiently as if I was writing fiction.

I also have to do research. Don't get me wrong, I love researching. I research for my fiction pieces all the time! I just feel like my sources need to be a step above when writing non-fiction, which is added stress.

In short, these non-fiction pieces are going to be on the short side, or at least, that's what I expect. I could surprise myself and go back into each chapter and triple their lengths, but I doubt it. Although, who knows?

The benefit of working on this is it is so incredibly different than my fiction projects, I can't get confused. It's impossible. LILITH AND AMMON is just so different, utilizing completely different sectors of my brain, I feel like there are two different people working on these projects.

Maybe there are.

Before I get weirdly philosophically writer on you, let me leave you with this thought. While this is a difficult exercise, it is stretching me. I feel that happening. I feel my writer chops growing as I force myself through this head-banging stress inducing project. I know when I get to the end, I will feel amazing, the same way it feels when I finish a really tough work-out. Satisfaction through the roof and the most absolute gloating rights you ever saw.

Oh yeah. I'm totally going to gloat if I turn this into something fantastic (and I will). Just watch.

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Confessions of a Non-Romance Writer - I Write Romance

I've never thought of myself as a romance writer.

I always thought romances had to involve throbbing manhoods and surrendering valleys. Fabio would grace the cover, and the unnamed female model would have some cloth draped just over her unmentionables.

Though, I guess Nicolas Sparks writes romance. The smultzy epic love story counts as a romance. Two people over space and time, and despite all odds find one another - and more importantly, stay together! It's not the pulp paperback section of the secondhand book store (or maybe it's right next to it!), but it counts. Totally.

I thought science-fiction and fantasy were isolated from this sappy genre.

I'm an idiot.

Now that I'm writing Book 3, Lilith and Ammon, I have come to terms with the fact that I write romance. I don't write erotica. I don't write about pulsing rods and rhythmic rocking, but my characters do get it on. It's a part of adult life and relationship health that I couldn't possibly ignore. However that's not the only interpersonal thing I write about. There are transformations that take place, not only with individuals, but within relationships and families. And there are some big love themes (not to be confused with the primetime show).

Lilith and Ammon is an epic love story. It spans centuries. The Khloe Alwell series is a conclusion (and the beginning) of that epic story. Yes, there are environmental and war themes that are important, but everything comes back to the choices this one couple makes. So it's a fantasy. It's a romance. It's an adventure.

I'm not a romance writer, except, I am.

Thursday, June 14, 2012

Character Bios: Lovers and Rivals, Camulus

I decided I should finally start giving some character bios for Lovers and Rivals. In that vein, I started with an unusual choice (and one I didn't expect to even write) - Camulus Remicapra.

Every guy needs a best friend. For Toran, Khloe's brother, Cam is that man. Camulus is named for a Roman god of war, but a more obscure one than the well known Mars. I wanted a name that was a little more unusual but could be shortened to something accessible in the human world.

Even though Cam is human friendly, Camulus himself is a bit goodie-goodie and rarely ventures into the human world. Despite that, he would gladly do whatever Toran asked of him, even if it meant disobeying his father.

While Cam primarily plays Toran and Laran's foil, occasionally he acts as a foil for Khloe. In the castle garden, for example, when Khloe and Cam have a conversation, their interaction helps to show just how unusual Khloe really is.

Just as Leo or Julian are models of what it means to be Seelie, Cam is a model Sidhe. He contrasts starkly with characters like Macha, who he hates. Most importantly, however, he contrasts with Laran, who has a perverse love of human culture.

Friday, June 8, 2012

Idea Gurus - How I Came Up With "The Brothers"

*SPOILER ALERT* - It's not big, but it's there.

How does anyone get an idea?

I have no idea.

Really. And when it comes to my own, I can't remember.

According to a variety of personality and preference tests, I am a problem solver - a solution giver - the idea guru if you will. I come up with ideas the way a factory makes widgets. Granted, sometimes there is a problem with the machinery. Sometimes something doesn't get stamped correctly and it has to be melted down and remade. Other times it's the epitome of widgets. And I live for their creation. I do.

I'll be honest. The idea for the Grechs did in fact come from a set of three brothers who DO exist. But the Grechs are nothing like them, except they're beautiful and talented each in their own way. And Greek. Those boys are Greek. That idea was the beginning of the story. Originally I thought it was going to be their story, but it became something else entirely.

Khloe is, in many ways, me. But she's also very much not. They say that every character in a given book is a reflection of an author, and that is definitely true. I can't deny that. Khloe's outfit in the first chapter is based off an outfit I did wear in high school. And I did love those red pants. That's probably why I wrote them in. They were fantastic.

And anyone who went to Albany High School will recognize things about the high school Khloe attends. It is loosely based on that school - because when I was there, it was awesome. All of these things are true. But there are many other things that I came up with from other parts in my life. For example, the jazz band Khloe sings with is based on an experience I had in college. The costume shop is a combination of consignment and vintage clothing stores I've frequented over the years. The list goes on...

In the second book, Lovers and Rivals, I used my knowledge of British castles and continental palaces to create many of the spaces. Kolmarden is the tree house I always wanted. I've always loved the forest. For me the woods are a place of wonder and magic. It only makes sense that the perfect man for Khloe would live in the woods.

And speaking of Laran... Laran is the best parts of a punk drummer I once knew, and the gentleman every woman wishes was hers. He's a little dark for the average girl, and snarky like every perfect man should be. And no, I have never met a live human who could act the part. I imagine there are a few animators from Japan who could capture him perfectly however...

The characters and places in book 3, Lilith and Ammon, you have yet to meet. Frankly, I want to save describing them specifically for the completion of that project. However, I will say most of the people and places in this particular book are drawn from mythology. The way I treat a number of creation stories/myths could be described as irreverent. The story is a development of ideas that were glossed over in books 1 and 2. This is the forgotten history of Lilith and Ammon, and therefore Khloe and Laran (if this is confusing, read books 1 and 2).

I have a plan for book 4, and no, I have no idea what the title of that book will be. When I figure it out, I'll let you know.

Needless to say, from my characters to the premise of the story, to the development of the series generally, it's clear that ideas come from a lot of different places. They develop and change over the course of a writing project, no matter the writer. That's part of what it means to be a problem solver/solution giver. It's the pleasure and the pain of being an idea guru.

Saturday, March 10, 2012

"Misogyny Just Part of the Culture?!" A.K.A. "Sci-fi For Girls"

If there is one thing I hate, it's misogyny. Some might argue women-hating is dead. If someone honestly thinks that, it is our duty to take them aside and dispel their delusions. Misogyny is alive and well in one of the most popular American subcultures - nerd culture.

First let's figure out what "nerd culture" means. For the purposes of our discussion, let's assume nerd culture includes hard-core gamers, LARPers, table-top gamers, anime lovers, comic-book fanatics, as well as sci-fi, paranormal, and fantasy lovers. We could include some "geek culture" in this, and add engineers, mathematicians, and computer scientists - there certainly is overlap. However, I think nerd culture, as opposed to geek culture, is the real culprit when it comes to misogyny. Nerd culture does not require any degree of sophisticated higher-learning, whereas education is required in geek culture. Let's face it, the academy is a bit more accepting of gender equality (though women have certainly had a tough slog in the hard sciences). Besides, we're emphasizing a culture spurred by entertainment, not occupation.

Now that we're clear on who is included in our beloved nerd culture, let's tackle the giant flailing elephant in the room.

Why is it that women are second-class citizens in nerd culture?

I think there are several contributing factors. One is the perception of women as evil, manipulative creatures. In the past, nerds were less desirable mates. Thought of as unattractive, and socially incompetent, who would want a nerdy husband when the perfectly-formed athletic ubermensch was available? Nerdy boys have traditionally been friend-zoned, and as we all know, once being declared a friend, it is difficult to be anything else. The collective hurt of being relegated to friend, tormented, and misused by immature teen girls has become internalized by nerd culture. This hurt was transformed into a seething hatred, which was fueled by other aspects of nerd-dom.

This leads us to a second contributing factor to the misogynist nerd. This is the prominent adolescent idea that women are objects, as opposed to subjects, with the sole purpose of providing pleasure. Even if a female character is supposed to be self-possessed, she always appears in spandex, fitted vinyl, or rubber. If she's fully covered, her outfit is skin-tight, but she is just as often half-naked. Usually she has long, tousled hair. She is always beautiful. There is always the undercurrent that her real purpose is to please the men around her, as opposed to any agenda of her own. This depiction of women is an expression of a previously held conception, while serving to reinforce the ideas associated with such images.

While this depiction of women may be one of the more overt contributing factors, there are others that are more insidious. For example, the type of thinking involved in nerd culture is primarily analytical, as opposed to relational. This is perpetuated by the types of games and stories popular in nerd culture.

Honestly, women think differently. Our brains function differently. We react to information in different ways from men. Because nerd culture has been predominated by men, the type of entertainment present is clearly tailored for them. It makes it difficult to break into such a culture, because clearly, women are not welcome. I've heard from many of my nerdy friends that relational stories are stupid, unrealistic, or just plain bad. Of course, these are the same stories that would appeal to many female audiences. I say this because biologically, women are predisposed to concern ourselves with family and community relationships in an effort to raise children. This is not to say that all women are empathetic or relationship oriented (many are not). However there is no reason why hard sci-fi can't have some depth of interaction between characters.

The final contributing factor to nerd misogyny is it's traditionalism. The majority of nerd culture is incredibly closed-minded, though it generally considers itself to be progressive in nature. There are two ways society labels a person progressive - if they have strong leftist opinions (to the exclusion of any other possibility), or in the willingness to entertain opposing or differing perspectives.

The problem is, many nerds think of themselves as progressive in one or both of these ways. Often, however, they are the exact opposite. Let's consider, many nerds consider themselves to be intelligent. However just because a person is intelligent does not mean they are capable of entertaining different perspectives. Intelligence does not require a person be willing to change. And if a person is stupid, good luck trying to figure out the trigger that inspires change.

So yes, nerds may be comfortable entertaining quantum physics theories, and exploring the development from a given comic of 1953 to one of the present, but this does not mean nerds are progressive. In fact, the development of many of the stories so popular in nerd culture is steeped in ancient myths as well as superheros created when Donna Reed was still a "good" idea. Traditional, for the nerd, is in.

There is always a hero - the hero always saves the day. Ideas of chivalry and dominance hierarchies are alive and well. Of course those two heavy weights bring associated gender identities. As we might suspect, women are to be saved, sexed, and set aside (either left in the tavern down the road, or protected by being sequestered in a fortress). It's enough to make this woman want a claymore.

There are many reasons why nerd culture is misogynist, and therefore, we need to attack this belief from a variety of angles. This is one of the reasons why I am so committed to writing the types of stories that I do. I wanted to create things that were "female friendly" - stories that encourage a different perception of women. But a few writers creating stories with different depictions of women is not enough - first and foremost, we need a broader recognition of the incredible misogynist tendencies of nerd culture. Once this is recognized, we can address it on a broad scale in such a way that it can be changed.

After all, the first step is recognizing we even have a problem. How else can we get to step two?

Friday, March 9, 2012

Honing Your Voice - Spreading Your Message

J.R.R. Tolkien and C.S. Lewis both understood that fantasy is an excellent way to communicate morality. After all, why else would myths exist across the world? Joseph Campbell would tell us stories are the traditional way ideas are communicated. Consider why Jesus' parables still reside in the front of society's mind? Why would Aesop's fables still be published after thousands of years?

I recently read a blog post about the five important rules every author should follow. One of them had to do with the reason for anyone writing in the first place.

I have always been told to find the one thing that I would do regardless of being paid. Working for love rather than money doesn't constitute work - rather it is a calling. This blog post I read suggests a calling is not enough to be a successful writer. This makes sense - after all, just writing because you love it doesn't mean you will get any readers. If you write for love, rather than some goal, there is no need to have readers. However, what is the point of writing if no one reads your work?

It's a bit like a tree falling in the middle of an isolated forest. If no one hears it, did it really happen? If no one reads it, was it ever written?

This got me thinking about my own goals in writing. Why do I write? What is the message I want to communicate through my writing? Obviously there are different messages for different books. Some of them are responses to the conversation of various genres, characters, and scenarios. Others have broader goals - discussing the issues of climate change, war, gender roles, and the obligations of those with power. These are the real reason why I write - the messages I want communicated.

The form these messages take is my voice. That said, my voice changes from one novel to the next. Let me explain. Many who know me will say my character Khloe has many similarities to myself. Well, if Luke is George, then yes, Khloe is me. Except of course, this isn't exactly the case. Each character is a composite of various people and experiences I've had over the course of my life. Their motivations and experiences are therefore different than mine, or any other person I've met or known. This composite, usually framed in the first person (my preferred point of view), is the voice that speaks the message. There is something personable and accessible when interacting with a character from their perspective. Yes, third omniscient certainly allows for greater maneuverability in writing, but first lets a reader get into the main character's head. It is more like a dream - the reader sees everything through this character's perspective. It also makes it easier to keep everything consistent when writing from a set perspective with set motivations.

Don't misunderstand - I wouldn't suggest everyone write in first person constantly. Only the perspective in which we write has goals, reasons, and motivation in itself. All writers have to ask themselves - why am I writing this way and not another? What is my purpose? What are my goals?

Then, once these questions are answered for one piece, we have to ask them again for the next, and the next. A writer's work is never done. There is always more to do, to perfect. There is always more to say. We are, in fact, a group of voices that never shut up.

Thank God for that.